My Encounter with “the Wall”

Over the holidays, things somehow became… a lot. Not just a “busy calendar” kind of lot, but really a lot. Family, logistics, work, everything ran in parallel, and on top of that came projects that had to be re-sorted and put back into the right place.

Things you want to “quickly” wrap up before the end of the year suddenly felt like heavy boxes you’re dragging from point A to point B while all you actually want is to stop and breathe for a moment.

And then that feeling hit one I know from sports: as if I’d run straight into a wall during a marathon.

The wall isn’t the end, but it’s honest

Anyone who’s ever gone for a longer run knows it: you’re in rhythm, you’re functioning, you’re moving forward and then, quite suddenly, everything becomes thick and heavy. Your mind wants to keep going, but your body says, “Stop. Not like this.”

That’s exactly what those days felt like. Two of them were exceptionally unpleasant. Not dramatic in the sense of “nothing works anymore,” but unpleasant in a quiet way: pressure in the system, inner resistance, a tiredness that isn’t just physical.

The kind of exhaustion where every additional task feels like a mountain, even when, objectively, it’s small.

Stay calm. Keep going. Think again.

My first instinct was: stay calm. Don’t overreact, don’t question everything. Keep moving, just differently.

Because when you hit a wall like that, forcing your way through doesn’t help. You have to rethink the trickiest task. Not necessarily solve it immediately, but look at it again: What is actually difficult here? Is it the task or the way I’m loading it onto myself right now? Is it the amount or the expectation that everything has to be perfect all at once?

So that’s what I did: I kept going slowly. Step by step. Staying focused. Working by priorities.

You don’t quit anything, except maybe letters.

That phrase made me smile because it’s so dry and so true. This wasn’t some heroic story. It was more like quiet perseverance. No dramatic turnaround, no “I’m changing everything starting today.” Just: don’t give up. And don’t shove it away.

The way you tell yourself in a marathon: Okay. Ease the pace. Breathe. One more step. And then another.

Priorities are good but there’s one that belongs at the very top

And then this thought arrived, one I couldn’t push away anymore: I can set priorities, I can structure, plan, organize… but if I keep placing myself somewhere between item 6 and 12 on the list, it won’t end well in the long run.

I need to put one priority first: me.

Not selfishly. Not as in “everything is about me.” But as a foundation. Because if the foundation wobbles, even the best projects don’t matter. If I’m only functioning, I eventually lose my sense of direction, meaning, and energy.

I’m getting much better at it.