I found Haanel’s readings this week to be of perfect timing and meaningful. They ALL do, but this week in particular. I am enjoying the course, the process, even though so often it has taken me out of my comfort zone.

I realize that I must experience the uncomfortable challenges and realizations to shed and grow, but WOW!! The tears that have poured from eyes, the awakenings I am experiencing – sometimes feels too much to endure.

Mixed feelings are abundant- shame, anger, hopelessness, enlightenment, fatigue, hope, determination, gratitude, inspiration….my mind and heart have been on the most wild rollercoaster I think I have ever endured.

Part fifteen, #3 – “Difficulties, inharmonies, and obstacles, indicate that we are refusing to give out what we no longer need, or refusing to accept what we require” – oh, that is like a punch in the gut and sheds light as to what my guide has been trying to get me to realize, maybe? Yes?

#4 ”Growth is attained through an exchange of the old for the new, of the good for the better; it is a conditional or reciprocal action, for each of us is a complete thought entity and this completeness makes it possible for us to receive only what we give.”

#7 “…Difficulties and obstacles will continue to come until we absorb their wisdom and gather from them the essentials of further growth.”

#8 “…We gain permanent strength exactly to the extent of the effort required to overcome difficulties.”

Thoughts into words into action- desirable actions come only from desirable thoughts.
Throughout my life, I have faced, endured and overcame many hurts, traumas and challenges, changes.

I was of the belief that I had desirable thoughts and did follow-through on many with great successful actions. I AM a good and kind person that deserved better. But those were only for the moment.

Those got me on to the next situation or challenge, I learned how to handle similar situations, but long-term success still evades me. The garbage or cement still holds me back.

The daily readings, actions, and repetitions are helping me to chisel away at the cement.

But apparently, I have not allowed myself to “let go” of some deep-rooted pain or shame. I take 3 steps forward but slide back two. The ground crumbles beneath my feet when I dig in to step up.

“I AM NATURE’S GREATEST MIRACLE” says scroll IV. I have been drawn closer to this principle and have read it with more vengeance or emphasis than the others scrolls. I am a miracle, for many reasons.

I have wanted to believe that I am, but now I need to know, teach myself that I am to actualize it. I need to allow my thoughts and words to manifest this belief. I had an epiphany about promises.

I could keep them for others, feeling obligated and not wanting them to become disappointed in me. I didn’t, however, keep them to myself. I did not keep promises I made to myself.

I must, I will, I Am letting go of what I do not need and accepting what I require, focusing on abundant thoughts, expressing love, acceptance, gratitude, experience as knowledge, knowledge as my sword and shield. I always keep my promises (to myself).