This morning, I rose early and relieved my body, because I’ve been up all night catching up on assignments, proceeded to the sink washed my hands and commenced washing my face and brushing my teeth and immediately a thought came to me.
Turning on the TV, I caught myself and said I’m not watching the TV. Gail King is on sit down relax its Thursday no appointments rest today. I’m not doing anything today! This isn’t the exercise “the man in the mirror” this is the man inside me.
That stubborn son of a gun that doesn’t want to be bothered. He lives rent free, eat free, ride free, never have any money doesn’t take responsibility for a darn thing. But got an opinion of everything.
Who the heck are you to impose uninvited your will over me? You know me, I am your ride and die. My choices are your choices you want to be like me. I began to think and he interrupted me. Don’t do that! I got you just relax I got this. I know what you need, what you want and what you like.
I went to meditation mode, closed my eyes to become the silent observer and just sat there and began to think. Last year at this same place week eight I tuned out and stopped the lessons and just made each session but not progress.
I believed I had no energy to complete the course just to show up that’s good enough you did your best at least you didn’t quit you are still here you did great.
Still no action just observing now who I perceive to be my “subby” in rare form. I realized I had trained him well to talk a great game but no results. Determined to be present but empty in the end.
I have all I need to be successful but can’t make the cut of what I truly want to achieve. I am not a failure, I know where I want to be. I need direction, focus, drive, commitment, clarity of mind and a team that won’t let me quit. But what if I quit the team?
That is exactly what I did when I quit the team. I heard Ms. Davene, Mr. Mark, Ms. Lori, Ms. Day, Mr. Brad, Ms. Huff and Rev Drew.
Mr. Mark Dressed in His tuxedo signifying the pinnacle of the journey for all that are still here with us you made it. That was when I felt the lowest because I allowed subby to win and the strange thing all through the celebration was silent.
I defeated myself, cheated myself, let myself down, approved of my failure and received exactly what I earned. But not what I deserved, THAT WAS 2024.
This is 2025, I became a Lifetime Member because I knew I could have completed it if I would have completed all the lessons and did all the exercises and mastered all the drills. I am back and I am fighting every week.
Subby is still with me, but I now tell him shut the hell up. This is my life, I am worth it, it not without, it’s within. I am in charge, my thoughts are constructive and harmonious, and the result will be good. I always keep my promises.
Do I get knocked down yes! But I get up on the eighth count, am I sometimes seeking air gasping and feeling it’s over but I scream “get yo but up and “do it now right now” I may take a day off, but I stay up all night the next day to complete the assignment.
I will punish procrastination when he opposes me. I and fighting for my independence from my choice to fail.
I see the people, hear their cries. I am their bus driver. They are on my watch, I can see the babies, hear the mother and men that just need someone to come and show them the way.
Young men in the streets, young ladies wanting a different life and think there is no way out of the choices they have made.
The programs that are working and people believing in their dreams and seeing what they can do working in harmony to achieve a common goal.
Now seeing that if one reaches one and helps one it really does work. Love and community really can transform a neighborhood.
Time is of the essence! I can’t wait any longer! IT IS IN ME! IT IS IN ME! IT IS IN ME! IT IS IN ME! MY CHOICE! MY CHOICE! MY CHOICE! ALL RIGHT NOW! ALL RIGHT NOW! ALL RIGHT NOW! TODAY! TODAY! TODAY!
MR. MARK, I WILL WEAR MY TUXEDO THIS TIME! THANK Y’ALL MKE! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!
THIS TIME “MY CHOICE”
YOU ARE AWESOME MS. CANDY! THANK YOU!
Roosevelt, I have so much respect for you in your dedication to your future and owning the real you, your choices and mistakes. The past is behind us and now is all we have to change, and you SIR, are owning every decision, and every reaction. I can’t wait to see you in that Tuxedo in four months as you graduate top of your world!! Living your best life!
What an incredible testament to the power of sustained commitment. It’s inspiring to see how the seeds of community and love planted last year in MKE are now flourishing into decisive action this year. That journey from “we can” to “I will” is everything. This isn’t just a new year; it’s a new level of conviction. Cheers to you, Roosevelt, for wearing the tuxedo and stepping into your powerful role. MKE is better for it
I can identify with you. This is my first time doing MKE and “I almost let go. I was right there at a breakthrough and couldn’t see it.” Music is such a part of me.
Well done, Roosevelt. That is so true, we all make choices, and today you are choosing your future self and success!