It’s a Tug-of-War

Oh golly! I was fired up after Week 1, ready to create cracks in the cement. But life pushed me down again and the cement held strong. My plate is so FULL, I feel exhausted but I worked at keeping on task with my readings.

I did miss a few and I completing my homework late in the week. Even though, I feel a sense of accomplishment.

When the Gravatar task was presented, I thought immediately, Oh GOOD GRIEF! WHY???? Another electronic/digital requirement! I felt like Charlie Brown attempting to kick the football and Lucy (the Fab D) yanked it away and I fell to the ground in despair. (Apologies DaVene. I know you weren’t alone, lol).

Being the perfectionist that I am, I had to find “just the right picture’ to represent myself……hours later, yes HOURS, I had to settle for less than I wanted.

I did find 3 wonderful pictures to choose from, but they weren’t able to download into the program. I pulled myself out of my quest and selected a picture. Finally realizing I was being stubborn and unproductive. Like Cher said to Nicholas Cage in “Moonstruck”, “SNAP OUT OF IT!”.

The positive thing for me, as I was searching for just the right picture, I discovered images and quotes that resonated deep within me and began to give me encouragement. I found THE picture – a person’s head and hands reaching out of a cracked ocean of cement.

Chains were around the wrists which lead around the neck. Growing out of the hands were beautiful, brightly colored flowers. WOW! This one is perfect for this course, this journey. The pictured visualized exactly what we all are attempting to so through this course.

Onward!

A few other take-aways from this week 2 are the Chore Card, the Trilogies=Healthy Mindset email Mark sent out and I finally viewed the OATS videos. I accomplished my task on Tuesday!!!

Words and intentions from the Trilogies are being spoken by a few people I follow on FB, leaning them in our readings and even in some of the quotes I came across while searching for my “perfect” gravatar!

WOW. We just need to open our minds to hear the words, trust the process and believe in ourselves. Everything we need is WITHIN us. In our hearts, our souls.

I want to provide a little background about what I mean by my plate being so full and allowing the cement to hold so tightly.

I have my own massage therapy business, slowly building a network marketing business, (with intention to leave the massage business), I am working on completing a certification course to be a Para Athlete Track & Field Official to pair with my USATF & State Certifications (more deadlines!)

I had intended on creating a curriculum for a “couples massage” class to offer to the public by September, yet nothing on paper yet (cement) AND I am struggling with a pending divorce.

Wednesday night I allowed myself to entangle in a negative confrontation over the phone with my estranged husband. I was paralyzed. Subby took over, the cement gripped me tight and I gave in.

I could not bring myself to focus on my homework, my readings, my chores, my business…I sulked. I laid on the couched, covered by a “security quilt”, hiding from the world and my challenges.

I didn’t feel any better until the next morning when I ignored a text from him, a meager attempt of an apology. My heart was heavy but I was present for my clients and I cam home after work and dug into my Master Key Experience (MKE) homework.

In conclusion of my blog this week, I want to share a few quotes I came across while searching for my gravatar.

Thoughts become things. If you SEE it in your mind, you’ll hold it in your hand. Bob Proctor.

What you carry within you, is stronger than anything outside of you. Unknown

Hmmm, sound familiar?!!