This has been an emotionally stressful week. You know the kind of days when something happens that just sets you back on your heels. Where you find yourself weeping and can’t stop. When your brain accepts, but your heart can’t seem to. And you can’t even remember how to smile or what joy felt like.
At times like this, habit is comforting, comfortable even. Forming good habits means you are still positive, doing the right thing albeit automatically rather than defaulting to negative, harmful, or self-sabatoging actions that a past version of you has allowed to stay around long enough and occur often enough to become habit.
I believe someday things will feel better and I can smile again. Until then, I will keep making my good habit a habit.
Oh, Darnelle, I love that you know and are practicing this in a challenging time–and cheering you forward! You wrote, “habit is comforting, comfortable even. Forming good habits means you are still positive, doing the right thing albeit automatically rather than defaulting to negative, harmful, or self-sabatoging actions.” Yes!
Darnelle, thank you for having the courage to share this. Your description of your brain accepting what your heart can’t is so poignant and true. Please be gentle with yourself. The fact that you are leaning on your positive habits during a time like this—that you are consciously choosing that automatic positive action—isn’t just comforting, it’s incredibly strong. It’s a testament to the work you’ve already done. Holding space for you and believing with you that the smile and the joy will return. Until then, one good habit at a time.
So wonderful to see those good habits.